Cheaps: Bruins, Vagiant and Monsters, oh my

From this week's Cheaps in the Herald: Rounding up Bruins parties, Vagiant's CD release and the Monster March at Government Plaza. Woot.

STRANGE BREW BRUIN
Boston Bruins away-game viewing party
Hard Rock Cafe, 22-24 Clinton St.; Saturday, from 6:30 to 10 p.m., all ages, FREE
In the National Hockey League, there’s no team that embodies rock ’n’ roll like the big bad Boston Bruins. So it’s fitting the team has paired up with the Hard Rock Cafe for its first away-game viewing party of the season while the black and gold is in Ottawa taking on the Senators. Bruins mascot Blades and the team’s Ice Girls will be in attendance, and there’ll be raffles and prizes. But there’s also a Bruins-themed cocktail list, which got Cheap Thrills thinking - what if fans in attendance selected their adult beverage based on the achievement of each player? After all, the Hard Rock Cafe bar is stacked. So if German Marco Sturm scores a goal, order a shot of Jagermeister; if Patrice Bergeron nets one, rally up a Cognac; if young netminder Tuukka Rask gets the start, pour some Finlandia vodka; if Americans Tim Thomas [stats] or Blake Wheeler stand out, roll with a Budweiser. And of course, with a predominantly Canadian roster, just keep that Molson and Labatt chilled on ice, just like the B’s themselves.
Info: 617-424-ROCK, hardrock.com/boston, bostonbruins.com.

CALL 800-54-VAGIANT
Vagiant Boston CD release party
Great Scott, 1222 Commonwealth Ave., Allston; tonight from 9 p.m. to 2 a.m., 18-plus, $9
There is one Vagiant battle brewing between Los Angeles and Boston. As the decade-old California-based comedy group Vagiant has forced our beloved female Allston punk band to slap a “Boston” onto its moniker, the ladies of rock trudge on tonight with their album release party at Great Scott. “Trash Candy” continues their own potty-mouth punk in the sonic thrash vein of the Ramones and Stiff Little Fingers, all while declaring love for all things beer, chicken wings and “The Karate Kid.” But this is more than just hot inked-up chicks playing speedball rock ’n’ roll - they’ll certainly arm wrestle you after the show if you get too drunk and out-of-line. Also on the fiery bill are Planetoid, Tenefly Vipers and Razors in the Night, featuring vocalist Troy Schoeller, owner of Allston’s very cool shock-rock clothing boutique Horror Business. Wear plastic vampire fangs to this bash and prepare to bleed.
Info: 617-566-9014, greatscottboston.com, myspace.com/vagiantboston.

MONSTERS BALL
2009 Boston Monster March
City Hall Plaza at Government Center; Saturday, from noon to 10 p.m.; all ages, FREE
By this time of year, the weekend highway backup to get into Salem stretches down to the I-93/Route 128 interchange. Thankfully here in the Hub we have the very accessible 2009 Monster March, an all-day charity event that benefits the Samaritans. It’s free to enter and hang out, but if you donate to the cause, things step up a notch to the tune of mechanical bulls, obstacle courses and a giant Velcro wall. Those preferring to not pay-to-play can chill to the autumn-esque goth-cabaret sounds of Walter Sickert & the Army of Broken Toys, as well as live performances by locals Ketman, Casey Desmond and Jaggery. There’s also a a mile-long monster and zombie march as well as a worldwide simultaneous dance to Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” around 8 p.m. Now that’s something no mere mortal can resist.
Info: monstermarch.org, weirdbostonevents.org.