Goodbye, Taco Bell

The Taco Bell at Boston University's Warren Towers is turning into a Starbucks. This is the worst news I've heard all day. Now I have to go into Cambridge or Slummerville to get my Grande Soft Taco fix ("I'll have seven, please"), and you know how much I love crossing the fucking river. Ugh.

Rock of Love 2 kills me

I’m exhausted after tonight’s Rock of Love episode, where we are left with a 37-year-old* soccer mom (Ambre), a rubber fallen angel who once fucked CC DeVille (Daisy) and a purple pending lawsuit with tits (Destiny). Nice top three. He should just go back to Heather, who he had to send home after it was clear she was drunkfucking with the leftover skanks. I don’t think we’ve seen the end of Heather. This shit won’t work out with any of the remaining tran-umvirate, so we’re either destined for Season 3 or Bret’s running off with last year’s runner-up. Ok.

But it was nice to see Bret showing his compassionate side tonight, overlooking the slut-tastic tidbit that CC DeVille (most likely) "unskinny bopped" Daisy Duck back when Poison couldn’t draw dick on tour (ie the '90s). Open up and say ah, Bret, because It was a House of Whores, and it turned into a House of Horrors. History repeats itself.

It’s truly amazing the spawn of a Real Doll and Janice from the Muppet’s Electric Mayhem is in the Top 3, but there’s something about Daisy that I love. And it’s not the Nightmare Before Christmas tattoo.

Tonight we say goodbye to RoL's Baby Without a Well, Jessica, who was too good for this show anyway. But before she ghosted we saw her varsity golf talents, shedding some light as to why she dated Bagger Vance, who dropped by the house last week.

Hey also, who paid for the ad for Boston pop-sprite Casey Desmond around 8:40pm during Rock of Love on VH1? Cool to see a local musician on VH1, even if it’s through paid advertising.

*Up next, the always entertaining Parental Visit, where we find out Ambre is 37!!! Oof. But she doesn’t look a day over 42. Am-Bray! Am-Bray! Am-Bray!

D'backs Doug Davis is no joke

Though he's giving new meaning to the phrase Cancer in the Clubhouse, mad props to Arizona SP Doug Davis, who will squeeze in two starts (April 3 and 8) before undergoing surgery to remove a cancerous thyroid on April 10.

Trainwreck City, pop. 2

Oh boy. The Queen B and I, post-Audiogasm. 4am, March 19, 2008.

Dise Lounge goes silent

Another day, another Boston live music venue goes kaput. I'm semi-sad to see the Dise Lounge go, and not just because the last thing we need in this city is another Irish Pub. But the Lounge, in its five years or so, housed many cool things, including the pill, Start, and several art showings. I DJ'd the Light 2.0 Placebo afterparty there backintheday, met the wonderful and amazing Bartender Michelle there and that's where the pill's first Halloween show (The Information/The Cure & the Cignal/Happy Mondays) went down. In fact, much of the pill's new guard was shaped at the Lounge, breaking away from the seedy underbelly of North Station, and taking the pill from a subterranean word-of-mouth scene to a visible force in Boston nightlife.

And hey, maybe when they renovate/remodel, they can erase the "pill fags must die" graffiti on the wall outside the men's room.

Riders in the Storm

Ok, today’s topic is band riders.

Now, in my experience, most “riders” are developed by “artist management” toolbags who sit in a cubicle all day, with some balding Boss Man wearing a blue dress shirt with white cuffs demanding they milk as much as possible from a venue or promoter who has graciously offered to host a touring band. (Now yes, I know bands get ripped off all the time. But my experience of bands getting ripped off when it comes to veggie platters and cereal is fairly limited, so read on...)

But what’s funny about these riders is that the band is often oblivious to these demands. When I approached Joel from Elkland before their pill show around 2005, I told him about the list of demands tattooed on the back of my hand, including “assorted meats and cheeses,” by the donkey schleps at the William Morris Senior Center Agency. His reaction was nothing short of horror, and apologized profusely. We haven’t heard from them since.

Currently, I’m in negotiation to have a band (which shall remain nameless) play the pill this summer. They’re not very well known, but are way cool and decent guys that I’ve worked with in the past (I’ve both booked them and wrote about them for a national music mag). They used to handle booking and business negotiations among themselves, but now they have “management” and “agents.” Oh boy.

Last time I booked them, they seemed pleased with the crowd and party. Upon their return, they demand this stuff:

1 Case Bottled water
1 Case Local Domestic Beer
2 Bottles of Red Wine
Veggie Platter
Cheese/Cold Cuts with Wheat Rolls
Seasonal Fruit
2 Cans of Albacore Tuna
1 Quart Orange Juice
1 Box Cereal
1 Quart 2 percent Milk
1 lb. Ground Coffee
Bowls, Plates and Utensils “pls.” (Oh, they’re courteous!)
12 Clean Towels
Bottled Water
DINNER FOR FIVE

Wheat rolls, albacore tuna and ground coffee!! This sounds like a day at Canobie Lake, not a rock show in Allston. Jesus fucking Mary.

Smashing Pumpkins suddenly concerned with "artistic integrity"

Apparently forgetting about the recent release of "Zeitgeist," the Smashing Pumpkins have sued Virgin Records for damaging their "artistic integrity."

The band filed the lawsuit Monday in Los Angeles, alleging Virgin used the Pumpkins music in a "Pepsi Stuff" promotional campaign tied in with Amazon.com. Virgin is not authorized to use the band’s music to sell outside products, the Pumpkins maintain, even though they've been the band's label for 17 years. They can, however, sell downloads and spare parts from the ice cream truck seen in the "Today" video.

Members of Zwan, Billy Corgan’s other music credibility suicide attempt, were not available for comment.

George Michael live in Boston

...July 27 at Boston's Toronto Dominion Banknorth Garden. Tickets ($47.50 to $152.50, hello guest list!) go on sale next Friday. I will try to not solicit gay sex from an undercover officer in the men's room under the enlarged photo of Bobby Orr.

Is this (take out order) made just for two?

It’s been an interesting and mildly fun past few days – frustrating car troubles late Friday, a redonkulous night at the pill (another sellout, eighth in nine weeks), a kickass draft in Orkney Road, good times seeing Zach Info’s new band Saturday night at TTs, and a quiet day around Harvard Sq. yesterday.

But clearly the highlight of the weekend came late last night after meeting BTF at her place of employment out in lovely and scenic Acton, Mass. Before heading home to watch that smug cunt Megan get tossed from Rock of Love II, we hit up some dingy-assed Chinese Restaurant that is so ghetto-fab it’s not only open late on Sundays, but Easter as well. Pork Friend Rice is my resurrection.

So we egg-roll up at the aptly-named Makaha, and chill in the bar-lounge that hasn’t been remodeled since the late ‘70s. As I was about to find out, the corner jukebox shares a similar grip on the moderately distant past.

I promptly began sucking down on an electric lemonade (but in a manly way as to not offend Joe Townie watching hoops at the bar) and waited for our traditional round-eye order or chicken fingers, wings and spareribs. Soon, a 30-something townie couple saunters in to the lounge and finds a place at the bar. After ordering what was no doubt an Easter-themed scorpion bowl for a deuce, they quickly made a beeline to the jukebox. I almost expected the girl to flick in a nickel, jab the beastly machine with her elbow and crack open a bottle of coke.

But what she did next astounded me. Of all the songs one expects to hear in 2008, regardless if I were in a time-warped New England suburb or not, I was not ready. I was not prepared to hear, out of nowhere… Tesla’s “Love Song.”


Ok, hold on. Who the fuck puts on Tesla from a jukebox in 2008? What jukebox still has the “Great Fucking Radio Controversy” in its collection? Did it flip the vinyl and play a 45? Was it actually on that “medium of the future,” the vaunted compact disc? Was there a “Nice Price” sticker on the CD sleeve? What kind of Twilight Zone shit was I dealing with here? And will this woman be offended once I start belting out the chorus? Would the townie guy kick my ass? Is Jeff Keith actually in the back making my Appetizer Combo Number 5?

My mind raced so fast I forgot how absurd that minute-long guitar solo intro was.


Now, don’t get me wrong – This song rules. And in fact, I made a point to hear it live when I saw Tesla at the Station Nightclub Benefit (I was on the clock, natch) in Providence last month. It was a fulfilling experience, and much better than anything Winger, Twisted Sister or the dude from Mr. Big brought that night (Michael Sweet singing Boston’s “Piece of Mind” with Gary Pihl and Todd Sholz was tops, though).

But of all the shit I was expecting to hear, that just wasn’t on my radar. As the song goes, “Love will find a way.” I thought that love was knocking, outside my door, waiting for you, with a love made just for two… but that was just my takeout order.

And when we hightailed it home to watch the leather-boot face of Bret Michaels send the most annoying reality show whore packing, I realized the joke was on me, and the late ‘80s will never ever go away.

Now if only Cinderella’s Tom Kiefer was the cop who pulled me over on the way home…

Kate Nash Confession

Before I head out for the day and embark on a 48-hour dance party/rock show suicide cycle, I will admit that I really love Kate Nash's new single Foundations. Add me to the population of WTF City. That is all for today.

The Sun Lee Sunbeam at the pill 03.21

Hey look... a repost. For my Friday night dance party tonight in Allston:

Hey, remember guitars? This week's live guest, the Sun Lee Sunbeam, certainly does. Taking its spiritual cue from the likes of Sonic Youth and Slater Kinney to create buzz-saw pop songs entrenched in pure rock n roll abandon, the Sunbeam is sure to leave our Great Scott stage in a sparkling wake of pink and gold glitter. In fact, we have demanded it of them.

So with that in mind expect a slightly dirtier rock n roll dance party this week, as DJ Ken raises his pint to the best in Britpop, Modern Indie & Beyond and Michael V plays the part of drunken host on the floor.

Live it. Love it. Look sharp about it.
xoxo the pill

Portishead's Machine Gun... not bad

I may be all late to this, but Portishead’s new single, the aptly- titled Machine Gun, available for online listening. It’s been about a decade since we last got original tunes from Beth Gibbons, Adrian Utley and Geoff Barrows (of whom my street in Allston is named), and I have to say: This is pretty cool.

I love how steady the beat is, and the build-up is pretty intense without overdoing it. There are some awkward lyrical moments, and Beth’s delivery is as haunting as ever. It took a second listen or three to wrap my head around the climactic synth stream at the end, but overall this is a real promising sign.

I was one of those people in the ‘90s who felt Portishead were doing shit on a completely different level (their show at the Hammerstein in NYC around ’98 is still in my top performances of all time list), and after ten years they still have that mystique. This sounds like Portishead, but with an evolved aura. I expected the new stuff to be a bit more abrasive than ‘Dummy’ or the hit-or-miss self-titled, and I’m psyched I haven’t been let down. When was the last time you waited a decade for new music from a band or collaborators, and was NOT disappointed? The album arrives April 29, btw.

Slow news day

Now, I could have told you a long time ago that the penis has a mind of its own, but overall CBS News should be applauded for its effort.

Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah" atop Billboard download charts

I stopped questioning the absurd power of “American Idol” after I astutely realized Kelly Clarkson’s “Since U Been Gone” was the best song released this decade. But things have hit a new level of insanity this week, as a simple Jeff Buckley comment by douchnozzle extraordinaire Simon Cowell has vaulted Buckey’s cover of Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” to the top of the Billboard download charts about a decade after anyone stopped giving a shit.

Cowell said something to the effect of “Buckley’s cover is the best ever,” or something along those insightful lines, after some contestant sang the song in a recent airing. Now I’ve always been a “Last Goodbye” kinda fella myself (and think Buckley is vastly overrated, especially by white people who wear hemp beads), but thank the angry fish in the mighty Wolf River Harbor some bestial choadsmoke named Flo Rida didn’t knock him out of the top spot. You may be dead 11 years this May, but you still posthumously move units, Jeff. Bravo.

The 10 top digital downloads, compiled by Billboard. Each song is followed by its ranking the previous week.
el5

1. ``Hallelujah,'' Jeff Buckley (Columbia/Legacy)
2. ``Love In This Club,'' Usher Featuring Young Jeezy (Jive/Zomba)
3. ``No Air,'' Jordin Sparks Duet With Chris Brown (Jive/Zomba)
4. ``Love Song,'' Sara Bareilles (Epic)
5. ``Low,'' Flo Rida Featuring T-Pain (Poe Boy/Atlantic)
6. ``Don't Stop The Music,'' Rihanna (SRP/Def Jam)
7. ``See You Again,'' Miley Cyrus (Hollywood)
8. ``With You,'' Chris Brown (Jive/Zomba)
9. ``Sexy Can I,'' Ray J & Yung Berg (Knockout/Deja 34/Koch/Epic)
10. ``Elevator,'' Flo Rida Featuring Timbaland (Poe Boy/Atlantic)

Audiogasm in the Globe

Tonight is the night...

Sleazy and robotic beats, what's not to like?
By Luke O'Neil
March 18, 2008

"Modern electro music now comes packaged as pop songs," explains Michael Marotta, "which is what has helped the genre cross over to the indie rock crowd." The longtime promoter of the popular Brit indie dance night the Pill at Great Scott expands his operation down Harvard Avenue, taking over O'Briens on Tuesday nights for his new dance party Audiogasm. "The music is sleazier, synthier, and more robotic than the standard Pill set list," he says. "Plus, it's a good excuse to get glammed-up on the dance floor on a Tuesday night." 21+ 9 p.m. $6. O'Briens, 3 Harvard Ave., Allston. 617-782-6245. greatscottboston.com/obriens
Copyright 2008 Globe Newspaper Company.

Ting Tings say "Fuck off, Boston"

So latest UK flavor-of-the-fleeting-moment The Ting Tings have canceled their Great Scott show tomorrow, preferring to instead stay in NYC and do a free, last minute gig at Mercury Lounge. I'm certain they'll fit in among the other dipshits and bloated egos down there. Apparently they were just so fucking awesome at SXSW that they can't be bothered to roll up I-95 and fulfill previous commitments. What the fuck?

Oh, well, Audiogasm was gonna be more fun anyway.

Justice at the Dise

Review of Saturday's crazytown Justice show in today's Herald. Good times all around...

And tomorrow: AUDIOGASM. Maybe you've heard? xo

NIN's "Ghosts" pulls in $1.6M in 1st week

Trent Reznor just pwned the music industry. Holy shit. It was one thing for Radiohead to do the pay-what-you-want model, but it's another for Reznor to essentially make "Ghosts" available (at different prices with varying features) to each level of his fanbase, from the curious (the free 9-track download) to the fanatical (the $300 limited edition piece). Reznor 1, Music Biz 0.

NINE INCH NAILS GHOSTS I-IV FIRST WEEK FIGURES REVEALED

Nine Inch Nails' 36-track instrumental opus Ghosts I-IV, released March 2 via NIN.com, has amassed a first week total of 781,917 transactions (including free and paid downloads as well as orders for physical product), resulting in a take of $1,619,420 USD.

"These figures represent the most relevant and contemporary metric for measuring how Nine Inch Nails' music is reaching its fans," said NIN manager Jim Guerinot.

NIN's label The Null Corporation will not be releasing traditional sale figures to soundscan.

As previously reported, the $300 Ultra-Deluxe Limited Edition of Ghosts I-IV immediately sold out its run of 2500. The $5 Download, $10 2XCD set and $75 Limited Edition Deluxe versions are still available at NIN.com.

The $10 2XCD SET will be released to retail April 5 in Australia and Japan, April 8 in North America, and April 7 in the UK and most European territories. A $39 4X vinyl version will be available at retail April 8.

Ghosts I-IV has been released under the Creative Commons license.
http://creativecommons.org/

Ch. 7 did a story on smoking around the Wii

Hmm, wonder where they got that from?

Also, was I hallucinating last night when I saw an ad for Chocolate Mix Skittles? I may have been out of my making-sense zone, as I swear I had just heard a Saul Williams song in a Nike commercial. What the eff is this world coming to?

"Creepy gnome" terrorizes Argentinean youth

Seriously, what the fuck is this all about? A bunch of kids in Argentina are just chillaxin with a phone camera, when suddenly a gnome appears in the distance. A cross between a Jawa, the Travelocity gnome and those creepy things from that old Joy Division video, the creature has caught the attention of the UK Sun. This clip is worth viewing...

Wii have a smoking problem

So you can't smoke in bars, you can't smoke in restaurants, and now you can't smoke around your Wii. Good thing I don't smoke nor play video games.

No bathtime!

The Lolabear was getting pretty dirty and scuzzy living it up in the wretched pit known as Le Barrows, so it was high time for a kitty bath last night. Armed with rubber gloves, cat shampoo, a hysterically laughing Terence and a warm, inviting tub, this 8-minute exercise in futility was, surprisingly, a moderate success. Lola got clean, but vengeful. She refused to sleep in my bed last night, and for the first time since moving into the new crib in September, she didn't accompany me into the bathroom for my morning routine. As Morrissey once said, "My cat holds more grudges / Than lonely high court judges." Just look at the DEATH STARE I got last night:



But now she's all clean and furry, and hopefully I won't have a mouse tail sitting on my pillow when I return home. Lola can have a pretty bad attitude sometimes (I blame her mother), so we'll see what awaits me at home. I'm prety sure it won't be love.

Blackout weekend

Yikes. So I've just come to, in a hazy shade of pirate-eye, and left the bedroom for the first time since arriving home post-Kain early Saturday morning. What a weekend. Passion Pit destroyed another sold-out edition of the pill (6th sellout in 7 weeks, with the only non-capacity night the snowstorm-ridden Friday), Saturday was a lovers wasteland of bedroom narcotics and Vanya All-Star film viewing (Party Monster, 24 Hour Party People, Ghost World, Velvet GM), and now the Hotel Barrows is a ghostland at 3pm Sunday, with hockey on the scren, a kitten at my side (don't lick the CD jewel cases, love) and this machine on my lap. I'm eating leftover chinese and wondering what's next. Not ready to start another week.

Also, Click/Clash was back at le pill. on Friday. Cheers Susie.

Video: Protokoll "In the Fall"

Peep this: the new video from Protokoll for "In the Fall," shot at a Allston basement show sometime last year. Check the lo-fi version over on YouTube. Viva la Protokoll!

Krief keyboardist wanted by FBI?

From today's Boston Herald Hotline: Robert Plant says no to $200 million to reform Led Zeppelin, and Montreal's Patrick Krief (of the Dears) had to cancel his Boston gig because his Italiam immigrant keyboardist shares the same name with a man wanted by the FBI. Or maybe that's what customs told him -- Krief thinks it's because his piano man "has a bit of a temper" and might have told US officials "to fuck off" during questioning.

Also, props to the Boston Phoenix's Burn Unit, as there's a reference to MARION, and Jamie Harding's post-career as a garden gnome stealing smackhead. Ace work, David Thorpe!

D-Listed says Patrick Swayze is dying.

5pm edit: The news is being confirmed by Perez Hilton, and he looks to have a month or so left since the cancer has spread throughout his body. Fucking hell.

She leads me through moonlight, only to burn me with... pancreatic cancer?!?!!?

D-Listed took a lead from the National Enquirer and says Swayze has five weeks to live after cancer treatment, and Fafarazzi jumped all over this as well. I might just wait for official word from TMZ. This better not be true. If it's not, this tops that forced plane crash Swayze had in the '90s to get his name back in the press.

Feel her breath on my face... her body close to me... Can't look in her eyes... She's outta my league!

Dresden Doll works with NIN

Mad props to Brian Viglione, drummer of the Dresden Dolls and all around genuine dude, who has hooked up with Nine Inch Nails on their new album, Ghosts. The rumor had been circulating for a while, and I knew about it in November, so it's cool to finally be able to write about it. Say what you will about the Dolls, but after catching their second-ever show around spring 2001, they opened me up to the local music scene, and a few years later I pay my bills covering it. Word.

Angry Journalist dot com

Well I just found the best website ever. More than a thousand annonymous comments from bitter people making a living in a dying industry.

Angry Journalist #1373:
An organization devoted to hiring people smarter than a states attorney, but too stupid to realize they are getting paid less than the guy who empties the trash.

Angry Journalist #1354:
I’d like to offer a toast to the genius who decided to make reporters punch in on a time clock, then mandated a “No Overtime” policy.

Let’s begin with the obvious. Reporters don’t work bankers hours, so expecting us to punch in and punch out for an exact eight-hour day is asinine, not to mention totally oblivious to how reporters work in the first place and the nature of “breaking news.” I’m sure if faced with a time clock, Woodward and Bernstein would have said, “Oooops, Ben Bradlee, we’re out of hours, we don’t think we’ll go chat with our friend in the parking lot. Screw taking down a Presidency and exposing corruption! We don’t want to cost our employers a couple of hundred dollars in OT because we’re good corporate automatons.”

Angry Journalist #1228:
I get angry when people write a letter to the editor and then refer to it as their “article.” Oh, did you see the article I had in today’s paper? No, because it’s a damn letter.

New pill flyer for March/April

The latest pill flyer hit the 'net, Allston streetpoles and various corkboards about town this weekend. It features the one and only Brigid the Fierce, and was shot deep within the Hotel Barrows hallspace.

Click Clash @ the pill 02.29

Local fashion blog Click/Clash hit up the pill last Friday, and I spy Clementine, Mark and JUSTINcredible. (Yes, I know someone called JUSTINcredible... He's mad chill.)